I'll mark this topic as "solved" haha ... if you ever remember what happened by accident; then please share 😉 

I have tried a number of things s o unsure which worked, but I now see the changes in real time. Wish I could tell you what I did :)

Thanks.

~Bob

On that note: the way you're experiencing your NAS share is not the way it should work, right?
I mean, you should see a file when you add it.

The change in the /etc/nsmb.conf is something you can skip. I noticed this morning that it actually makes things worse.
Your milage may vary of course.

Did you check the Synology forums?
SMB3 supports the so called "Change Notification (CNF) protocol" which means that changes on your share can be reported by your Synology to your Mac. If this is not implemented on the Synology side of things, or not enabled (doubt you can find that setting in the user interface), then this may contribute to a poor update performance.

Not sure if this is an option on a Synology NAS: but maybe set it to only SMB 3 (versus SMB 2-3)?
Note that this may impact other clients connected to your NAS.

CMD up and down was one of the first things I tried a week or so ago. Does not refresh. There was one other CMD xxx but cannot recall what. Did not work either :)

Did you make a noticeable change to the NAS from another computer and see the change in real time?

I can add a 25GB file to the NAS in windows and Mac will not see the folder size change until eject/remount.

But again, please do not spend time on this. I thought if easy, great, another benefit of CMN.

Trying to do as automator which ejects easily, but once ejected will not find the NAS to mount. But its only a few clicks to eject, remount and open the NAS.

Open nsmb.conf as root, then set the dir_cache_max_cnt value to zero by adding these lines to the file:

In Terminal:

sudo nano /etc/nsmb.conf

(you'll need to enter your password)

Add the following:

dir_cache_max_cnt=0

Save with CTRL+X and confirm the question "Save modified buffer (ANSWERING "No" WILL DESTROY CHANGES) ?" by pressing the Y key.

Next make sure all mounted SMB shares are UNmounted.
Once all are unmounted, mount the shares again.

Note: I even rebooted my Mac, and so far I do not see a negative effect yet - even very large directories popup pretty fast.

Press and hold the Command key, and then tap the Up key and after tap de the Down key.

Effectively going one directory level up and back to the directory where you were. Seen claims that this refreshes the Finder view, but like I said: am unable to test and confirm this.

I thought perhaps if I did a one click eject on the NAS that Connect Me Now might be able to be told to auto remount if I did that. Only for that NAS drive.

I'lllet you know if I find anything.

Mount and unmount is sequence may trigger this, but not the most elegant way. 😉  
I'm open for finding another trick, just couldn't find one while searching just now.

SMB1 is pretty bad when it comes to security indeed. Depending on the age of your NAS this could have been the only option. But by the sound of it, your NAS does SMB2 and 3. Nice!

I thought perhaps if I did a one click eject on the NAS that Connect Me Now might be able to be told to auto remount if I did that. Only for that NAS drive.

I'lllet you know if I find anything.